Saying "I stubbed my toe" does not do the act justice. It's not like we're dipping our piggies into a tepid pool to test its temperature. We violently kick dresser corners, table legs, and coffee tables so hard that stars blot out our vision for a few seconds before the pain surges in waves like an unforgiving tsunami of torturous agony.
My toe is purple. Purple! I accidentally "stubbed my toe" on James' baby swing and now my blessed toe is a shade of purple my body has never been. If it's broken I'll never know, because I refuse to sit in an emergency room for seven hours.
Which Lethal Weapon movie was it where Riggs was tied up and some thug was hammering his toes? THAT'S how I felt! Just like Lethal Weapon! And now I have a purple toe like a bad ass.
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