Monday, May 19, 2008

5 Cereals that Rip Apart Your Mouth

5 Cereals that Rip Apart Your Mouth.


5. Cookie Crisp: Those weren't little chocolate chips, they were mini-dangers aimed at your gums. Thankfully Cookie Crisp dissolved quickly in milk so you could actually chew it with only minor damage. (I think it's been discontinued.)


4. Kashi Nuggets: What happens when you put "a whole day's worth of whole grains in one bowl"? Your mouth pays the price. I tried this stuff once when if first came out. Never again. If you want to go this route, stick with Kashi Puffs. Your mouth will thank you.


3. Grape Nuts: Here's an ingenious idea: rock hard pellets that when crunched, tear apart your teeth and cheeks, and make your feel like you've just chewed a mouthful of sand. Ouchlicious! Dentist recommended!


2. Cracklin' Oat Bran: It's all right there in the title, three words that spell trouble for the your mouth. As a bonus, Crackling Oat Bran will rip your anal cavity apart a few hours after the roof of your mouth.


1. Cap'n Crunch: By far the winner. Every bite, whether fresh from the box or drowned in milk, went straight for the roof of your mouth and showed no mercy. This cereal is like a cheese grater. After a bowl of Cap'n Crunch you were hurtin', somehow I still went back for more. Blame that on the Captain's excellent sugar rush.

(Stolen from yesbutnobutyes)

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