But if I dare miss my monthly $172 payment to the Department of Education (aka student loan) you better believe those feds be chasing me through the streets like I'm Frankenstein's monster. Our world can be so comical sometimes. And don't get me started on providing healthcare to poor people! The thought of my hard-earned tax dollars helping ragged-clothed, shoeless, street urchins sickens me. People with no money don't deserve to be healthy.
I have an idea! Let's round up all those filthy beggars who have the gall to get healthy on my dime and send them to Iraq. Then we can have them search for the missing money - like a scavenger hunt, or an Easter egg hunt! Beauty!